Sorry, I went political.

Today, it's very difficult for me to not be bitter. I really don't want to be. I really want to have a good day. I really want to spend it with friends at church and with my family, and yet, here I sit, in the store, with no traffic because everyone is at home with their friends and family.

Oh well. At least it's not cold in here. Or hot. The temperature is just right. I should have brought a DVD in or something.

So, has anyone been following this Iranian guy's latest comments? Call me a crazy republican but I think Mr. Mahmoud Ahmedinejad is a crazed idiot. Every time he denies sanctions and acts all big and bad, he just furthers the theory that he wants nuclear weapons, and not just nuclear fuel. In his latest rant, he said something along the lines of 'America knows itself that it cannot hurt the nation of Iran one iota'. Excuse me pal. If you are using the war in Iraq as a reference, then you are a fool. We don't destroy everything in Iraq because we want the true friendly Iraqi's to have their country. If Iran wants to pick a fight, we'll flatten them. It won't be hard. Look at the first Gulf War and what we did to Iraq's military. A military that was supposed to be in the top five militaries in the world. Frickin idiot.

Apologies.

Behold, the Ninja-Bread Man!

Huge Manatee

And then a reversal.

I walked outside and it was warm and dark. The air was heavy, smelling of rain, recently evicted, and the low cloudcover dashed orange from the city lights hinted at nearby downpours waiting to pounce. There was slow but constant wind, rustling the leaves but hardly even touching my hair, leaving a slightly uncomfortable feeling of nervous intent.

I walked out onto the sidewalk, recently rain-soaked, and looked around. The world was closing in. It felt as though there was nobody else around; that I was alone in the city, just like a movie, with nobody to talk to, nothing to find, and something stalking around the darkness.

The orange glow of the city reflecting on the purple clouds left me desiring to find more, as I strolled off under the trees and through the wet grass to find something; anything.

I watched with disappointment as I saw myself wander aimlessly into the dark. I called out, but my voice was stolen in the wind, leaving nothing but rustling grass and my will to attempt an intervention. There was nothing that could be done. I paced back and forth on the porch, wishing I could have stopped myself from leaving, but I was far too talented at ignoring myself. I had to let me go.

I walked back inside, turned on the lights, and made soup. Broccoli and cheese fragrances lifted from the pan, as the gracefully potent tones of 'I Choose Noise' drifted from the stereo in the living room. The rain picked up in perfect timing with the climax of the song in a fit of coincidence.

The soup finished, and I sat softly on the couch, propping my feet up on the coffee table, enjoying the rain, but missing the interaction. The lighting in the room seemed to fade, if only due to my inattentiveness, staring out the window at nothing and everything. The soup grew cold, the music repeated, the thoughts remained, the doorbell rang.

I opened the door, and walked into the house, rain soaking my clothes, almost down to my bones. Water puddles formed where my feet had been as I walked to the bathroom, stood in the tub and stripped down, donned a towel, and went to make soup. The stove was strangely warm as I prepared the nights banquet.

I sat on the couch, turned on the tv and pulled up the newest episode of "The Office". I sat and enjoyed my soup, and the show, laughed at Jim, felt bad for Toby, wanted to strangle Michael, and fell asleep with the series on 'repeat'.

I awoke to the sound of Josh running down the stairs, and the sun shining through the blinds, ironically causing me to squint. I smiled as Josh walked by in his long underwear, and felt oddly happy, as if I had spent the evening with a friend.

I felt at home.

Crimson and Sickness

At least, that's how I feel this season starts off in retail. I mean, I spent last year's Thanksgiving all upset because I had to go to bed early so I could be at work at 4 am. One of my reasons for leaving Best Buy when I did was so that I didn't have to do that again. Long hours, impatient people, rude line-jumpers, and people who will sacrifice all kindness and fairness to buy a cheaper present for their kids.

So, I tried to get out of this, and moved to a new company. My attempt wasn't entirely in vain, but it was close. I spent yesterday (Thanksgiving) being upset because I needed to get to bed early because I was working a twelve hour shift starting at 7:45am. Crazy. I just want out of retail so bad. But what can you do? I mean, I've tried and as far as I'm concerned, I was lied to on many facets of this situation, and mix in a bit of naivete and a bit of my own bad decision making.

Anyways. Aside from that, I have recieved a new car, which is pretty cool. A 1990 Nissan Maxima. Funny thing is; the insurance on the Maxima is more expensive than the insurance on my Rx-7. No idea. Weird.

Also, I am probably going to start going back to school in the spring. That makes me excited. I like the feeling of 'belonging' to a school, so to speak (as long as it's not WSU, because then I just feel like I'm 'owned' by the school, which is stupid).

So ok. It's time to get back to work. *ninja vanish*

...and the apex seal fell.

Man, I'll tell you what; I have been the brunt of many jokes involving luck with cars. I mean, people always tell me "Seth, man, you have the worst luck with cars", and sometimes, I feel as though I have very bad luck with cars, which leads me to believe that my luck with cars is less than desireable. Sometimes, my luck just sucks; involving cars. Once in awhile, I get a cool car, and then luck shows up and does its thing.

Today I was on my way to work (which is unfailingly always when my car acts silly) and one of my apex seals decided to go away. At least one. Anyways, in 'i-dont-know-jack-crap-about-cars-speak', my engine blew. And the worst part is, I wasn't even doing anything fun. I was driving on the highway. I wasn't racing, or drifting, or evading police; I was just driving.

But you know, I've been through situations like this before, many times, and I'm sort of just used to it, or at least accepting of it. I'm honestly not upset. I honestly think it's kind of funny really. Well, time to go looking for car #9. Let me give you a run-down in case you have forgotten my history.

1. 1968 Chevy Impala -- Wrecked, Sold
2. 1994 Ford Escort -- Sold
3. 1987 Toyota Supra -- Engine Blown, Sold
4. 1990 Nissan 300zx -- Stolen
5. 1991 Dodge stealth -- Sold to mom, Bought back, Engine blown, Rebuilt, Blown again and sold.
6. 1988 Chevy Blazer -- Given Away
7. 1992 Olds Silhouette -- Sold
8. 1989 Mazda Rx-7 -- Engine Blown, TBA

That's all in the last 7 years. Yep, I keep myself busy.

Well, I'm going to go try to sell some phones so I can get a car. Bye for now.

-setH

I have fruit.

So it's been a few days since I've posted on here, or really anywhere online. Yeah, I've been busy, but truthfully, I just haven't really felt like posting. It is nice, however, to do so again. I know that for now, not many people read my website, let alone this blog, but someday, I will sit down with my wife and 2.5 kids in my suburban home after a long day as a middle class employee with limited responsibilities, and we will look back at these posts, providing blogger.com is still around, and we will laugh, and cry, and think, and then get bored and go watch The Office.

Things are strange these days. Lately I've felt a rush of personal responsibility, encompassing everything from finances to eating habits, and it's good. I'm excited for that. At the same time, however, I regularly encounter people who just seem to settle. Remember those 2.5 kids and middle-class job I spoke of earlier? I have no desire to be average (which hopefully you realized was the theme of that little rant). I want things that are out of the ordinary to become my ordinary. Just to make that clear. If I haven't said that enough yet.

I am going to admit, I wish like crazy that I was in a position to be with Aaron right now. He is living what I know God called me to do, and now, because I was doing my own thing, I have to sell phones to pay off debt before I can get out there. However, this time, I know what I did wrong. I don't know what exactly God has in store for me, but I'm excited about wherever I'm going, because I feel and see what he's leaning me towards.

I bought fruit. When I say "I bought fruit" I want you to understand what I mean. I bought 6 apples, 5 oranges, 4 bananas (yes, I'm one for numerical irony), three different varieties of fruit cups, and a bag of beef jerky. My shelf in the cupboard is strangely devoid of the usual participants, such as Campbell's various soups; the freezer is free from my usual frozen occupants, but I snapped and couldn't hold myself back from two things. Bawls and Tostito's Hint of Lime chips. Considering the usual habitation of my kitchen space, and adding to the mix my over-zealous bike ride across town the other day, I'd say I'm on track to lose a pound or two. Maybe three.

The time has come for my whimsical writing style to part electronic ways with your subconscious, so have a fine day, say 'hi' to someone you don't know, and trip someone you don't like.